Touchdown or Off-Sides?

Everyone knows that the Super Bowl is this Sunday. Though some people like me didn’t know until yesterday which teams were actually playing, certainly that won’t stop even the most indifferent or clueless of us from attending a Super Bowl party this Sunday.

And of course, with all of the Super Bowl parties this weekend, somewhere between the fumbles, touchdowns and Bud Light commercials there will be ample opportunity for a love connection to strike . . . “Hey, who are you rooting for? Them? Forget it, I was about to propose but now I see we have irreconcilable differences. At least let me get you a drink being your team is about to lose – By the way, I’m Joe.” It’s that easy. We fell in love over nachos. Or at least “like.”

But one lament I have heard from some men which invites discussion for this blog pertains to “the girl who knows too much” or the close relative of the girl who knows too much, “the girl who thinks she knows soooo much.” Forgive me my female counterparts, I mean no offense and I certainly don’t mean to be a throw back to the Victorian age. Clearly, men and women both participate and enjoy sports equally in these modern times. That’s a given. Nevertheless, men and women are different on some fundamental levels and most guys I know are not looking to date their tomboy buddies.

Let me give an example. Everyone has come across the girl who prides herself on knowing every stat on every team on every sport. Let’s call her Suzie. Suzie thinks it’s cool because she can hang with the guys, order a draft, and yell at the television - that’s just who she is. You’ll never find a lipstick ring about her beer mug. No question Suzie will always be invited out with the guys, but my guess is that’s where it ends: beer with the guys. What Suzie doesn’t get is that men have an innate desire to teach the girls they like about sports. It’s fun for them. If the woman comes in knowing more than they do, you’ve deprived them of that joy. If the woman is teaching the guy about a sport, forget it. You might as well castrate him.

Now, let’s go with “Jane”, a fun, smart single girl I knew who was looking to meet her Mr. Right. However, every time Jane played a drinking game and it was her turn to pick a topic she would invariably pick a random sports related theme to show off her limited knowledge: e.g., all baseball players whose names start with the letter “Q.” After a while, the guys would inevitably get frustrated and her ploy was transparent. Of course, most guys are interested in more than just sports. Instead of accomplishing what she wanted, that is to show the guys she’s a girl who can look great in a little black dress (Jane is definitely a lipstick girl) and hang in a dive bar surrounded by 10 flat screen tvs, she just came across looking like she was trying too hard.

I’m not telling women to play dumb. If you are a die hard fan, go and have a great time. I think most men agree that a girl looking sexy in their favorite team’s jersey would be enough to steal their attention even on Super Bowl Sunday. I’m simply cautioning women don’t be a Suzie or a Jane – or you might just get the Heisman. And men, I don’t think I need to tell you that this is a once a year opportunity – so use it wisely. Ok, I’m waiting for the onslaught… Men and women, as always, feel free to weigh in.